On realistic sex scenes

[emmagrant01]

I'm breaking a promise to myself that I'd NEVER post quiz results in my LJ again, but this one made me happy:


What kind of sex scene do you write?
brought to you by Quizilla

I actually STRIVE to write realistic sex scenes. (jedirita, stop looking at me like that. I know the carney fruit episode was a little out there.) I adore realism in slash, and nothing will pull me out of a story I'm reading faster than Harlequin-esque perfect sex. (It's sort of like looking at an airbrushed picture of a supermodel, you know? Nobody looks that good in reality!) Nobody regularly has sex that good! Reading about mind-blowing simultaneous orgasms that leave the people involved unconscious just makes me feel that MY sex life is somehow inadequate, just as the afore-mentioned supermodels make me feel fat, dumpy, and old. And I'm not that fat (having lost 25 pounds in the last two months -- yeah, me!), or dumpy, and I'm only 32. And I have a great sex life!

I think I prefer to write and read realistic sex scenes because I can identify with the people involved. When skin sliding on skin makes a funny noise, or someone doesn't loudly scream out their completion but makes a little grunt and they enjoy it anyway, or when one partner feels a little shortchanged and simmers about it afterwards -- those are things I can identify with, and it makes the relationship between the people all the more real.

Thoughts? Comments?

Comments

[lauramcewan.livejournal.com]

::nods:: So true, so true. Although sometimes I don't mind the fantasy of perfection!

GO YOU on the 25lbs!! I'm not quite 3 weeks in and have lost (at last weighing) 6lbs. I wish it were a bit faster but hey, it's still some gone, and I'm feeling better.

[emmagrant01.livejournal.com]

Atkins rocks, lemme tell ya. It hasn't even been that hard! The number on the scale just keeps going down, and the clothes keep getting looser. Other than traipsing back and forth across campus, I'm not getting that much exercise. I've always been a horrible dieter, so this just blows my mind!

Although sometimes I don't mind the fantasy of perfection!

Yeah, and I understand that. Especially in a first-time fic, it can be quite appropriate for the emotions of the participants to run a little high, and for them to be hyper-aroused. That is realistic, at least as far as I remember... But it just isn't perfect every time, and that gets annoying to read. I want to believe these people are in a relationship, and I want to see the good and the bad parts. I think it's harder to write realism, and so I respect writers who can pull it off well. Anybody can write a fantasy down, but making me really believe it is something else.

[lauramcewan.livejournal.com]

but making me really believe it is something else.


Ah, a goal for me to attain.

Atkins does rock! I'm not losing as fast as I thought I would, but I *am* losing. I may need to just re-evaluate and see if I'm eating something that's not helping when I think it should be. People ask me if I feel tired, that they hear people say they feel tired. I wouldn't say I feel tired; more that I'm not running around in a frenzy from carbo overload, with a screaming headache and foul moods.

[emmagrant01.livejournal.com]

I actually feel better now. There aren't any blood sugar swings, and I don't crash mid-afternoon. I did feel tired for the first week or so, but I actually have more energy now than I did before. I think I'm just one of those people who is very sensitive to carbs. I could completely live on pasta, and I do miss it. But I need to get back down to a comfortable (and healthy) size again, so it's worth it.

[clara-posts.livejournal.com]

I was pissed because when I did it I got 'romantic sex' - I have never yet written a simultaneous orgasm scene - swizz!! I like the sex quite realistic - not too perfect. Because in RL it hardly ever is... it's great but not perfect! When I did my Qui/Obi first time scene at the beginning of my series I had Obi spray his shorts almost as soon as Qui touched him... what's romantic about that??? Then I had him refusing to swallow.... ::stomps off to redo quiz with different answers::

[emmagrant01.livejournal.com]

Well, you do know that multiple choice tests are rarely valid measures, right? So what'd you get this time?

When I did my Qui/Obi first time scene at the beginning of my series I had Obi spray his shorts almost as soon as Qui touched him... what's romantic about that??? Then I had him refusing to swallow....

That sounds pretty interesting... I'm not sure I've read it. Link?

[clara-posts.livejournal.com]

Well, I did it again and got 'romantic sex' *again*...curses... Perhaps it's true!! (I think it's the monogamous answer tht's doing it) SO I had *ONE* more attempt and got:


What kind of sex scene do you write?
brought to you by Quizilla

So, that's better :o)

That sounds pretty interesting... I'm not sure I've read it. Link?

Now, there's a funny story here... this particular story sounds like everything that you dislike in slash (as per your post to the old MA list), so much so that, in a fit of paranoia when you posted that I assumed that it was a response to you having read it!! (As it had been posted about a week before!!) So Rita had to soothe me over and say you hadn't read it because you'd been away!! (Forgive me - I have an annual paranoia attack on 1st August!!)The entire paranoia attack is somehere on my journal :o)

Anyway the link is:

http://www.masterapprentice.org/archive/c/commitments01.html

Actually - the swallowing bit is in the not quite finished follow up... basically I do get them together when Obi is young, but I'm trying to explore all the 'problems'... the age difference, their student/teacher relationship etc. But that follows more in the next one. This one serves to bookend the whole series....