Recipe -- sorta... ;-)

[emmagrant01]

This is one of those things that makes the rounds every year, but my sister just sent it and it made me laugh. :-D



If you are like me, we are always looking for that special cookie recipe to share with our families for the holidays. This is the one I personally make on Christmas Eve to be able to deal with the "families" on this joyous occasion.

TEQUILA COOKIES
1 cup of dark brown sugar
1 cup (2 sticks) butter
1 cup of granulated sugar
4 large eggs
2 cups of dried fruit, such as dried cranberries or raisins
1 tsp baking soda
1 tsp salt
1 tsp fresh lemon juice
1 cup coarsely chopped walnuts or pecans
2 cups all-purpose flour
1 bottle Jose Cuervo Tequila (silver or gold, as desired)

- Sample the Cuervo to check quality.

Take a large bowl, check the Cuervo again to be sure it is of the highest quality -- pour one level cup and drink. Turn on the electric mixer...Beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl.

Add one teaspoon of sugar...Beat again. At this point it's best to make sure the Cuervo is still OK, try another cup.... just in case.

Turn off the mixerer thingy. Break 2 leggs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit.

Pick the frigging fruit off floor... Mix on the turner. If the fried druit gets stuck in the beaterers just pry it loose with a drewscriver.

- Sample the Cuervo to check for tonsisticity.

Next, sift two cups of salt, or something.

Check the Jose Cuervo.

Now shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts. Add one table. Add a spoon of sugar, or somefink. Whatever you can find.

Greash the oven. Turn the cake tin 360 degrees and try not to fall over.

Don’t forget to beat off the turner.

Finally, throw the bowl through the window, FINISH the Cose Juervo and make sure to put the stove in the dishwasher.

**** CHERRY MISTMAS ****

Comments

[slytherincesss.livejournal.com]

Haha, very cute! I've passed it along to my friend who particularly likes tequila :D

[emmagrant01.livejournal.com]

I think I would choose a better tequila than Cuervo, but hey. ;-)

[slytherincesss.livejournal.com]

Yes, I was thinking Patron!

[katina-r.livejournal.com]

omg Patron! And OMG your icon!!

[slytherincesss.livejournal.com]

Heh, I just made that icon a couple weeks ago. Everyone needs a santa hat icon for the season, of course. Or a hanukkah icon or a kwanzaa icon!

[umbralin.livejournal.com]

lol!

Thank you for sharing. I really needed a good laugh.

[emmagrant01.livejournal.com]

You're welcome! :-D

[dream-wia-dream.livejournal.com]

This is my favorite recipe. And one I usually follow at least once when trying to do my christmas baking! Hee.

[emmagrant01.livejournal.com]

LOL! Me too! ;-)

[splix.livejournal.com]

Ahaha! I'd never seen that. Thanks for sharing it. :D

[poetheather.livejournal.com]

What a great receipe. I may have to try it this year.

[tarotemp.livejournal.com]

Don’t forget to beat off the turner.

Heh. *smirks*

[emmagrant01.livejournal.com]

Oh, that is EXACTLY what I thought when I read it! *grins*

[http://users.livejournal.com/_irrlicht_/]

i'm so trying this once the next big birthday comes round. maybe i'll have my cousin help me

[lauramcewan.livejournal.com]

I do this one at least once a month. *hic*

[sesptwd.livejournal.com]

LOL. CHERRY MISTMAS I love that.

[willysunny.livejournal.com]

Dude. You rock so hard. And have fabulous timing. :):)

If the fried druit gets stuck in the beaterers just pry it loose with a drewscriver.

I do that on a normal day. That's why my husband (the chef) doesn't let me near his high-end cooking toy thingies. Once I tried to stick his Lamson Sharp knife set in the dishwasher. He screamed. It was amusing.

*heart*

[skarch86.livejournal.com]

CHERRY MISTMAS

*dies*

I think I'll try that recipe sometime soon. But I'll have to stay away from LJ that day, I don't think my f-list can take another drunken!post this month. *tries to look innocent*

[wintermoon3.livejournal.com]

sthang ewouu. i wassh juss tryin to baaache a bach of dese, budd I coon'nt fine my reshipy.

[zahavah.livejournal.com]

hahahahahahahahhahaa.

[daddybear716.livejournal.com]

Coming from a family where people had gotten drunk on my grandmother's rum cake, I found this pretty funny.

::::goes off to Gooogle for Rum and Coke cookie recipe

[katina-r.livejournal.com]

Brilliant! And just think of the possibilities! Tequila fruit cake, tequila cranberry sauce, tequila omelets... hehe.

[yaycoffee.livejournal.com]

HHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

[jedirita.livejournal.com]

Ow. I laughed so hard, I think I ruptured an internal organ.