More HP wankage

[emmagrant01]

primroseburrows has basically summed up my reaction to the latest (and greatest, actually) battle in the het shipping wars, so I'll just point any interested parties to this post.

When JKR tells you your ship has sunk in the sea of canon, people, why act like twelve-year-olds? Why can't you just WRITE FAN FICTION like the rest of us?

There be spoilers, btw. How much longer must we warn?

ETA: And lest anyone think I have the impression that all fans of that particular ship are lunatics, please rest assured I'm only talking about the true crazies. Here is an extremely reasonable one. (Thanks to didi522 for the link.)

I just realized she mentions my name in that post! Linking that wasn't intended as self-pimpy, FWIW.

ETA 2: Here's a fun thread: Harry has a small penis! It's canon!!!.

Comments

[sciencegeek.livejournal.com]

Ahaha! Dude, imagine if slashers acted this way? Or the people that theorised that Snape was a Vampire? Augh, I'm glad we (being slashers) aren't like this. My brain would explode.

I'm cutting for another month, 'cause a friend of mine doesn't have the book yet.

[sesptwd.livejournal.com]

Ya know...I just don't get this whole shipping war.

I mean, I never imagined in my wildest dreams that Harry would hook up with Draco or Ron in canon. Or that Severus would hook up with Draco, Lucius, Remus, Sirius, Harry or Hermione in canon. Or that in book 7, Hermione would confess that she's been secretly shagging Draco.

Yet, I still, happily write these pairings. I still happily read these pairings. I don't whine and bitch or insist that Harry and Draco *will* happen.

I'm not moping because JKR hooked Draco up with Pansy and not Hermione.

I will still write and read just as I always have. What the fuck is the big deal here people?

Canon and Fanon are two different worlds to me. I thought that was how it supposed to be?????? I thought that was what fanfiction was all about.

[sciencegeek.livejournal.com]

As quoted from fandom wank "People have forgotten that fandom is about porn, not canon."

Funny, how the Snape/Lupin, Black/Lupin shippers read the book and were like "Aw, Tonks? Oh well, let's write more fics" and the H/Hr shippers are all 'OMGTHEWORLDISENDING!!!!1!1!'.

[sciencegeek.livejournal.com]

I suppose that I should add "Lupin/any male character as well. *sigh* I'm so slow right now.

[loverly.livejournal.com]

the reason i never understand H/Hr is if they hook up, what's going to happen to Ron? maybe i've been reading too much H/D, but i can't see H/Hr as the smug marrieds to Ron's Bridget Jones. eh.

[xcarex.livejournal.com]

Ron exists in canon as much as OotP to these people, I think. He's just a sad footnote.

[primroseburrows.livejournal.com]

I'm not moping because JKR hooked Draco up with Pansy and not Hermione.

Pansy/Hermione. Now THAT would be interesting.

[emmagrant01.livejournal.com]

Canon and Fanon are two different worlds to me. [...] I thought that was what fanfiction was all about.

It is. You're absolutely right.

[emmagrant01.livejournal.com]

For me, it isn't even about interpretation of the text. It's about the fact that JKR has said on several occasions that Hermione and Ron have romantic feelings for each other, even before this book came out. I've always wondered a) why people are in such complete denial about that, and b) why it matters? If someone really wants Hermione to give Harry a blow job under the invisibilty cloak in the Gryffindor common room, by all means, they should write that! I'll even read it!

[emmagrant01.livejournal.com]

"Get your hands off my man, beeyatch!"

With Draco looking smug in the background, until that wrestling turns into something else altogether... :-P

[tarotemp.livejournal.com]

There be spoilers, btw. How much longer must we warn?

Hopefully not for much longer...!

*is REALLY tired of having to censor herself on LJ and in RL*

*flails*

[primroseburrows.livejournal.com]

Can this happen in a vat of chocolate, perhaps?

[emmagrant01.livejournal.com]

Yeah, that porn comment cracked me up!

[tarotemp.livejournal.com]

I'll vote for that!!!!

[emmagrant01.livejournal.com]

And they lick it off each other, while Draco jerks off.

[jedirita.livejournal.com]

On the other hand, the difference between a het ship and a slash ship is that a het ship could actually become canonical. So it's not just about your shipping preference, it's about people having theories about canon. The equivalent here is not slash shippers, but people who flipped out over Sirius dying in the last book, or people who will flip out over the next book because Snape turns out to be good/evil.

In any fandom, there will always be some people who become more invested in their own interpretation than in the source text. And if the source text ends up squashing their theory, then they go freaky. It's a case of people coming to have too much a sense of *entitlement* about the source text.

But on the other hand, there is the legitimate issue of the "contract" between author and reader. We need to be able to trust the author, and if we feel like the author has seriously deceived us about something, then we might well throw in the towel. So, for example, copperbadge made the statement that if Snape turns out to be evil, then he (Sam) will feel like a fool because it seems so out of step with what JKR has laid out for Snape so far. And I kinda agree with that.

So I've got my theory about Snape, but I'm also trying to reserve judgment on it because we don't yet know the whole story. But if Snape does turn out to be evil, then it has serious consequences for the whole series because it would seem to negate all the lessons she has previously taught us about Snape - that even greasy, nasty gits can still be good guys.

I feel like any normal *ahem* reader ought to have been able to predict Sirius's death and the Ron/Hermione ship. The H/Hr shippers feel like JKR has violated the "contract," but the truth is they got too invested in their own theory. It's fun to have your alternate theories, but you should remain a bit skeptical and open-minded about them. But the Snape thing -- that has to do with the theme of the entire series, which is why it makes me nervous.

Anyway, how did I end up talking about Snape? And despite all that I said above, the hysteria of some H/Hr shippers is indeed eminently wanky. But I guess my point here is to say that it's about issues of canon, not about ships.

Sorry for getting so intellectual about it! You may now return to your enjoyment of the wank show.

[primroseburrows.livejournal.com]

If someone really wants Hermione to give Harry a blow job under the invisibilty cloak in the Gryffindor common room, by all means, they should write that! I'll even read it!

This would be interesting, actually. Not to mention hot. Because Harry would have to be really quiet.

[emmagrant01.livejournal.com]

Yeah, the vampire people were very gracious, weren't they? They just shrugged it off and kept writing their fan fiction.

There's a lesson in there somewhere...

[emmagrant01.livejournal.com]

Harry: "OMG I'M COMING!"

Hermione: *facepalm* "Could you give the capslock a rest, for once?"

[primroseburrows.livejournal.com]

Anyway, how did I end up talking about Snape?

Because, of course, it's all about Snape after all.

[kirili.livejournal.com]

The references to a higher power were startling.
Makes you just love the slashers more, I spose.

[tarotemp.livejournal.com]

*remembers how in Franling's Resolution Draco refers to Harry as "mouse" because he squeaks during foreplay*

*giggles hysterically*

[kirili.livejournal.com]

HAIL. hahaha

[emmagrant01.livejournal.com]

You are always the voice of reason about such matters!

I totally agree that disappointment on the part of many H/Hr folks is a reasonable emotion. If Draco had been killed off in this book, I would have been really disappointed. I expect to be disappointed in how she resolves his story in book 7. So I do empathize with the people who feel that way.

It's fun to have your alternate theories, but you should remain a bit skeptical and open-minded about them.

Absolutely, and I think the vampire!Snape folks are a great example of that. They invested quite a lot into proving their theory, and as soon as JKR shot it down, they basically shrugged it off and went back to writing fan fiction about it.

What I don't get are the folks who are spreading rumors that JKR did this on purpose just to spite them, who are calling her names left and right, who are planning to take out an ad in the New York Times blasting her for "ruining" their lives the HP series for them. That level of animosity seems very, very misplaced to me. I feel justified in my mocking of those people, because I think they are giving the rest of us fans a bad name.

Anyway, how did I end up talking about Snape?

LOL! Was that a rhetorical question? ;-)

[kirili.livejournal.com]

Blaise sucks him off while Harry flies flashily around.