A bit more on epithets

As many people have pointed out on painless_j's post on this topic, a well-placed epithet can be used to convey important information about a character. The problem occurs when people do it simply to avoid repeating characters' names or "he" and "his" over and over. The resulting text is cumbersome at best and approaching ridiculous at worst. IMO, this is one of those little things about writing that one learns along the way, just as one grows out of the Mary Sue phase, learns how to use a colon and a semi-colon properly, to show rather than tell, to resist the urge to overuse adverbs, et cetera.

As a disclaimer, I recognize that I have a lot to learn as a writer myself, and I'm not suggesting that I am a great writer who has none of these (or other) problems. I'm still hashing a lot of this out myself, and this is merely my opinion.

I thought it would be fun to use an example to illustrate the point, so here's an excerpt from anise_anise's gorgeous Open Surrender (used without her permission, but I'm hoping she doesn't mind!):

( Behind a cut because it's porny. ;-) )

And that's my two cents. Or maybe a nickel, heh. I'm so tempted to challenge people to write the worst possible epithet-filled drabbles and post them here, just for fun. :-P

ETA: *spews coffee* Y'all crack me up! :-D

Related links, or It isn't just me -- other people who know a lot about writing share my opinion:
Banishing the Wild Epithet (great essay!)
Turkey City Lexicon (scroll down to "Burly Detective Syndrome")